{travel recap} japan

Back in October, {mike+I} had the opportunity to travel with his family to Japan. We visited Tokyo, Kyoto and lastly, Okinawa for the Okinawa Festival. It was a great experience and I can't wait to go back in five years for the next Festival!

Some highlights...

{japan+I} are obviously meant to be...

Seriously... my name? Spelled correctly? In a random foreign country. Meant to be!

{things that make me happy} giving back

I was an awkward child.

There may or may not have been a phase when I refused to wear anything but sweatpants. There were six years of braces (yes, six). There were a few perms, a lot of spandex, and then there was definitely a time that I got a bowl cut so my brother and I would look like twins.

Then there was junior high. There was a transfer out of my original district - a transfer that was necessary because the new school was the only one with an "honors" program in the area. So I was in a new school, and I started out with the nerd thing. Then there were still the braces, the baby fat, and eventually, another perm (before puberty laughed and stuck me with curly hair for life). My uniform was an oversized sweatshirt with oversized jeans. My curly, frizzy hair was always in a bun. I made a concerted effort to excel at being average; to blend in and avoid any reason for others not to like me. So one would say there was a whole heck of a lot of... average.

But there was also a lot of music. And art. And happiness.

There's been a lot of average in my short little life, and a whole lot of awkward. But the one thing that has always been my happy place, the one thing I was always, always good at, was the arts. If there is one thing that makes me sad above all else, it is that art and music education are being cut from our schools because they are not considered important!

So, the {thing that makes me happy} today is...

I was offered a position in the Vail School District to be an after-school art instructor! So four days a week for an hour or so, I will be teaching Kinder through 3rd graders art essentials through a program called KidzArt.

I can't begin to explain how excited I am to give back some of what made me what I am, to maybe replace a little bit of awkward with a lot of fun, creative education!

{ps} pictures make everything better... me, circa 1988, post-perm, pre-bowl cut and the year I started playing the piano.

Manic Mondays

I thought I lived in Tucson, not Phoenix.

Needless to say, Turk isn't the only "Sluggo" dawdling around the house today...

~Di

{thoughts} networking, negativity + needing goals

Sometimes I have this terrible habit of comparing myself to others.

The thing is, this terrible habit of mine flows in two directions. Usually it starts with a simple perusing of the Internet for inspiration. What's this person shooting? How are they shooting? Where are they shooting? Oh-em-geeee, they are so much better than me! Cue: downward spiral of shame.

Then, sometimes, I fly in the other direction. We're talking off the charts, cue downward spiral of shame for the wrong reasons. Like, shut your mouth, you're being nasty, "Oh-em-geeee, where did that thought even come from???" type of wrong reasons. Yes, it deserves three question marks. Because, you know what? I judge, and I judge bad. And I hate that about myself.

It usually starts quite innocently, with a simple perusing of the Internet for inspiration. Where are other photographers advertising? How much are they charging? Oh-em-geeee, are you serious? Why on earth do they think they can charge that much? They need more practice. People should not be paying for this. Why are people booking them and not me? This isn't fair. Life isn't fair. I need to work harder. And now, yet again, cue: downward spiral of shame.

So here's the downright, can't believe I'm putting this out there, god-forsaken truth: I am too quick to criticize, compare and speak negatively not only of myself, but of others. And guess what? It really has nothing to do with the other photographers at all. It's me, all me. I'm basically projecting my negative thoughts and feelings, my worries, upon others. Side note: I apologize to anyone who never knew that I said something internally negative. So, so sorry. I didn't mean it, really.

What, do you ask, is the point of this exceedingly rambling post? In hope of holding myself accountable, I'm going to start posting goals up on the Internet, for all to see.

Here's the first one:

Something I'm working on daily is to be supportive of others. To be a guiding light, to give advice freely - no matter what. I want to be available, I want to be approachable. I want to put out what I would like to receive, but not expect to receive it. I want to be positive even when negativity is trying it's darnedest to win. I want to be a teacher.

And I want to start a Tucson networking group for photographers.

From what I can tell, it doesn't exist. The closest PUG is in Scottsdale. There isn't much of a resource for people starting out, or even established photogs who want to hang out with other photogs. Not having mentors or local resources is like trying to swim in quicksand. It makes it so much easier to give up, and I don't want anyone to give up! If this is what you want to do, you should do it! And you should have the resources to do so. So if you're a local, e-mail me! dianne@dolliphoto.com

A friend of mine posted this quote the other day. It actually inspired this post and helped me put things into perspective.

Cheers!
~di

{things that make me happy} family time

My family is pretty spread out. I was born in Missoula, Montana but raised in the Seattle area (Kirkland, to be specific. Heard of Costco Kirkland Signature? What, what!). I left Kirkland at 18 and never went back, off on my Montana college adventure. Needless to say, it was a bit of a culture shock. Smaller, yes. Less-diverse, yes. And wait, y'all don't wear seatbelts? I can jay-walk? There's no open-container law?! (There is now, but a mere nine years ago, there was not - outside of city limits, that is.)

After many threats to abandon Missoula and high-tail it back to Seattle, my parents forced me to stay (and a good friend talked me into giving it one more chance), and guess what? Things changed. I spent a lot of time with my family - the extended half. My aunt and uncle became my second parents, my cousin evolved into a brother. I took a lot of pictures, enjoyed coffee and battled some demons. Then, eighteen months into my "Montana adventure," I met the cheese to my bread, the sun to my shine, my future MOH - my best friend, Lacee. She got me to loosen up, be more outgoing and took me on her kind of adventures. She dragged me on back roads going way too fast (I thought I was going to die), took me to the fair (it's not that kind of fair), taught me about 4H (it's more than cows and pigs, it paid for her college education) and 6-man football (yes, it exists). Most importantly, she taught me a lot about family.

I love my family, whether they're related by blood, marriage or friendship. I love them more because I've learned it's not about our differences, our drama or who's doing what - it's about enjoying each other when you're together, especially now that we're so far apart. We live in Arizona. My parents live in Austin, Texas. My brother is in Missoula. Mike's brother lives in Portland, Oregon. Mike's parents are in Butte, Montana but his extended family is in Los Angeles. I have aunts, uncles and cousins scattered across Montana and Washington. Our best friends (who are very much family) literally live in every corner of the nation. So basically, I'm lucky if I see these people once a year. This year it was twice! Thank goodness for celebratory occasions. First, our wedding. Second, my brother's college graduation. Although those who couldn't make it were missed, it was still fun. Here are a few pics of the graduation party last month in Missoula and a little introduction to some more of my "family."

Left: Grammie+JC. Right: Yours truly with said aunt+uncle, my "second" parents.

My dad, JC's buddy Greg, JC and part of Mikey.

{travel recap} sedona

A little side note re: yours truly...

I have a serious case of relocation-itis. It is accompanied by an ever more dire disease I have coined as "travel fever" - a situation that cannot, unfortunately, be cured by more cowbell.

As of this year, {mike+I} have developed a pretty consistent pattern: every two years or so, we move.

Sometimes less, sometimes more, sometimes near and sometimes far, but we are always looking forward to where we're going "next." This month we're moving 70 miles northwest of our current location (where we have lived approximately 18 months. Not that I was counting...) Last time it was 2000 miles south. Before that, 700 miles west. You get my drift. It's become our m.o. Lately, most of our discussions have centered around where we would be willing to go next - because there will be a next. Durham, North Carolina and Ohio have been on the list. The former might be a fun change of pace, but the jury is still out on Ohio. I like to think I'd be game to live anywhere, but Ohio? Hmmm... (no offense, Ohio-ans. By the way, is that what you are? Ohio-ans?)

Anyway! Basically, the only remedy we have discovered to assuage both of these terrible* problems is to go somewhere (read: anywhere) on a regular basis. It is also a much more manageable (read: affordable) option. It might be a road trip 500 miles west to L.A. to visit family. It might be a plane ride to the Northwest. It might be a stay-cation. It is basically anything to keep us busy, but also let us experience where we currently live and everything it has to offer. Besides, curing travel fever does require, um, traveling. So, for one of our April trips (and for my birthday), we decided to visit Sedona.

Sedona is a beautiful little artsy-fartsy town nestled among the Red Rocks of Northern Arizona. It is only a half-hour from Flagstaff and two hours from Phoenix, but feels like a world away. It is paradise for rock climbers, hikers and outdoorsmen (or women). There are mountains! And rocks! And get this: WATER! I can definitely see why it was a spiritual location for Native Americans (and still is). The beauty is stunning, and so very different from anything else you find in Arizona. Also, if spiritual things float your boat, it is supposedly a vortex mecca. Not really my thing, but the hiking was great!

We spent the majority of our weekend in Boynton Canyon because it was dog-friendly. Slide Rock State Park is supposed to be pretty dang awesome, but alas, super busy and no dogs allowed. Here are a few photos** from our hiking extravaganza.

*Sarcasm very much intended. Please do not take offense. If you suffer from any sort of actual "dire disease," my heart goes out to you and I wish you the best.
**Disclaimer: I am not, nor will I ever claim to be, a great landscape photographer. I love trees, but they don't love my camera. I'll stick to taking pictures of people - and my dogs. Cheers!

I do, occasionally, get a great landscape shot. Love this.

Hike #3: We hoofed up to this mesa in record time to see the sun set. Awesome.

{travel recap} san di-aaaahhhhh-go

I had a dream last night.


Not in the "I have a dream!" sense of the phrase, but more like the shock me awake and then lie there, wide-eyed, for 45 minutes type of dream.


There was this huge truck. A Dodge Ram, actually. It was towing a very, very full trailer. Not a car, horse or flatbed trailer, but one of those smallest-size-that-uHaul-offers sized guys. The only reason I could tell that the trailer was very, very full was because I was driving this humongous truck up a really, really, really steep hill. And we were struggling, definitely struggling. And I had this passenger... this really annoying passenger that kept telling me how ridiculous it was to try and tow this trailer, and drive this truck, up this gigantic hill.


But I kept driving. I dropped it into second and chugged up that damned hill. Because I knew the truck could do it. I knew that that bad-ass truck and the little ol' trailer could do it. Every time I felt like the incline was about to toss that truck backward, I just kept grinding up the hill. And you know what? As I was nearing the top, that annoying passenger bailed. Like, tuck and rolled out of that thing. And then that passenger, that annoying girl who just wouldn't shut up with the "why's?" and "this is a dumb idea"... she sat there, in the dirt. She sat in the rocks and watched as that Ram kept chugging, onward and upward, like Thomas the Tank Engine. And guess what?


The truck never reached the top. 


Wait, what? That's right. There was no end, no summit. There was no ceiling nor limits to how far I could tug that trailer.


And then I woke up.


So much of success is believing in yourself, in what you do. You have to believe that you are capable of doing more than what you think you can do. You believe in your mission, no matter what that mission may entail. So many of us are told constantly that we don't live up to our potential. That we don't, we didn't, we haven't, we aren't. And I ask them, what's with all the "n't"s?!


Three weeks ago, I had the fabulous opportunity to spend a week with the equally as fabulous Justin & Mary (and J2!). As I mentioned before, a lot of their workshop is focused on the why of it all. Why do we, as photographers, do what we do? Why photography? Why do you want to succeed? Why not? Why are you fearful? The list goes on and on and on. Always, always, ask "why?"


My dream last night is my why. I can't tell you how many times I've been told that I'm not living up to my potential, that I could do more, be more, succeed more. And you know what I tell those people? 


Screw you. 


This is what I do. This is what I love. I'm good at this. Edit that: I'm great at it. This is what I will succeed in, and I don't need you to tell me I could "do more" anymore. My "why" is because for the first time in a long time, I'm not miserable at the end of the day. I'm excited to "go" to work. I wake up, wide-eyed, in the middle of the night because I have ideas that I can't push out of my head - and thank God for that! I'm happy. I'm full of energy. I'm doing more, living more, loving more, and laughing more.


And you know what? Those "mores" I'll take.


Enjoy.


{ps} That's right, it's an Anchorman reference. Live it, love it, embrace it.

 

{Friday Funday!}

Just a quick look of my friend Kim's adorable puppy Lexi (aka Turk's new girlfriend!) before I head north to Sedona for my birthday weekend!

{birthday thoughts}

Today I am 27.

In 27 years, I have not achieved what I thought I would. I thought I'd have a masters degree, possibly a law degree, some sort of amazing job that commands me oodles of money, that I'd be the "boss-lady." Maybe those ideals were too lofty, but at the very least, I thought that I would have some degree of success that was measurable.

I thought.

The thing is, I have achieved milestones that I am proud of, just not the ones I "thought" I would.

I have my bachelor's degree. I am married to a wonderful, successful and supportive man. I have two awesome, well-behaved huge dogs. I have worked in journalism, design, finance and banking. I have lived in five cities in eight years. I have left my comfort zone multiple times - on purpose. All of which were super, duper scary... but I did it anyway. Most importantly, and perhaps the scariest, I left stability, consistent income and benefits to start my own business. I'm doing what I love rather than what others thought at which I'd excel.

I am still wrapping my brain around the idea that I don't have to measure my success against others. Something that is so easy to do, so easily quantifiable and so human, is something that I have to force myself not to do. I have to make a concerted effort into putting my ideas, energy and thoughts toward the future - into what I can directly affect - rather than drain myself in unproductive directions.

Don't worry, this isn't a pity post, merely a reflection. I have not achieved what I thought I'd achieve, but I think I've finally decided that's okay. Because in life, as in business, there is room for fear but not excuses.

Onward and upward.

{things that make me happy} really good beer

I have a secret. It's not bad, not really. Well, it's kind of bad. Just a little.

Mike and I's relationship is based on a mutual love of beer.

There, I said it. For the whole world (errr, blog-world) to see (err, um, read).

It's not bad, I promise. We're not lushes and we don't over-imbibe on a regular basis - we both just really and truly appreciate good beer. Not only is it yummy, but it's an association thing. Have you ever been driving down the road, wind in your hair, sunglasses on, and a song comes on that just transports you back to that one great moment?

That's what good beer does for me. Really good beer takes me here:

One of our gorgeous Montana Loveshoot photos by Sara of Whitebox Weddings

With that first sip, I can't help but smile. I get fluttery butterflies in my tummy. It takes me back to that first summer. A summer full of great beer, quiet water and huge mountains. A summer that was graduation, internships and not having a plan. It was road trips, meeting family, and being the first person each of us ever "brought home." One sip takes me to that first year in Portland, escaping the rain and finding solace in Bend. It makes me want to hike to the top of a mountain and appreciate how amazing this world is, and then realize it's in our own backyard. It makes me want to pack up my dogs, my tent and my husband and go float down a Montana river. It makes me want to sit and just... be.

But mostly? Mostly it just makes me smile and want to enjoy a really, really good beer. Together.

A few of my favorites:

1. Mmmm Guinness

2. Deschutes Brewery from Bend, Oregon. Nothing quite says summer to me like the June debut of Twilight every year.

3. Twisted Tea. A Montana thing by far and not a "great beer" but man, is it satisfying when it's 90 degrees out and you're floating down the river. Seriously, trust me.

4. Missoula, Montana. 'Nuff said.

5. Big Sky Brewery. One of many brewery options in Missoula, but Summer Honey is my Montana equivalent of Twilight.

6. Beltian White (Belt, MT). Only available in the state of Montana, they just started bottling it and it needs to go back to being only on tap. It is by far my favorite MT beer; we had it at the wedding and it was tapped before the sun set.

7. Ditto with Cold Smoke from Kettlehouse Brewery (Missoula, MT). Wedding choice, gone before sunset. Yum.

What do you associate with and why? Leave a comment and possibly win a $15 gift card! Winner will be announced Monday!


~di

{san diego} sneak peek

I just got back from spending a week with Justin & Mary. Wow. What an amazing, inspiring, educational week in San Diego! More on that later (it will get a whole post all to itself!), but here's a sneak peek of my trip to hold y'all over until I get the rest of {cela+noah} up.

Cheers!
~di

{things that make me happy} impromptu doggie photo shoots!

Need I say anything more?

tucson wedding photographer ~ when wedding photography info goes viral

I am a huge fan of Google Reader. Like, majorly huge. Every morning after I walk my dogs, I open my window, listen to the birds, sit down with a cup of coffee and read. It's cathartic, really. Kind of like sitting down with the morning newspaper.

There are a few photographers that I follow on a daily basis for inspiration, but it's inspiration that's mostly business-focused rather than art-focused. And honestly, if you took a quick glance at my Reader, a lot of the blogs I follow are actually writing blogs, not photography! Some of them are friends, some are just beautiful, and some are for a daily giggle or two, but the majority are for education. Whether it be wedding trends, "how to build your business" or Justin & Mary's awesome Pancake Sessions (side note: did I tell you guys I'm going to be their intern for the San Diego "Spread the Love" Tour??? So stinkin' excited!), I try to soak up as much information as possible every day.

On that note, as I build my business to bigger and better places, it is imperative that I continue to educate myself. In fact, apart from continuing to challenge myself creatively, it is my number priority. And apparently this week is the week for information about wedding photography because it's here, there and everywhere! Good, bad, and indifferent, there is a lot of information out there, but the posts floating around this week seem to be more of the former.

Because I think it's important that you hear (errr, read) more than just my opinion regarding wedding photography, here are a few great posts I've read this week that really clarified some more details concerning exactly what I wrote about the other day.

{Gia Canali}, a fabulous film photographer, wrote about wedding photography tangibles & intangibles.

{jennifer dery} put up a link to another site (which I'm now following!): Why you should NEVER skimp on wedding photography. And guess what? It's not written by a photographer!

Not from this week (or even this month, for that matter), but {why albums are important} - from the client's perspective (not my client, fyi).

Are there any blogs out there than inspire you? Teach you? Please share! I love new material. :)

Just because ... {I love this song} and am editing to it all day long today.

Cheers!
~di

{things that make me happy} introvert v. extrovert

At first glance, most people would classify me as an extrovert.

I'm a talker. A doer. An always moving-always thinking-always going kind of person. I laugh, I cry, I run, I play. I love checklists. I travel constantly. I enjoy being with friends - most of whom are quite loud+outgoing. I'm a type-A, oldest child through and through. I shoot weddings, aka LARGE GROUPS OF PEOPLE, for crying out loud...

But I'm not.

By definition, the true meaning of an extrovert is: "one who is energized by being around other people, who tend to 'fade' when alone and can easily become bored without other people around." When given the chance, an extrovert will talk with someone else rather than sit alone and think. In fact, extroverts tend to think as they speak, unlike introverts who are far more likely to think before they speak. Concepts just don't seem real to extroverts unless they can talk about them; reflecting on them isn't enough. So yes, at first glance, it would make sense to classify me as an extrovert. Me, the photographer of large groups of people. Me, the talker. Me, the always voted to speak for the group. Me, the "extrovert."

But I'm not.

I'm a thinker. An over-thinker, actually.

I am energized by my alone-time. I crave it, actually. It allows my brain to expand, accept all the things that are simultaneously thrashing about and categorize them as need be. It gives me the ability to relax, to stop going, and to just be in the moment. It allows me to re-evaluate, recharge, and then go again. I am not shy, but that in itself is not the definition of an introvert. Introverts are people who are energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to "recharge."

Which I do.

I love weddings. LOVE them. Never get sick of them. But the day after shooting one, I am drained both emotionally and physically. Maybe it's the 50 pounds of camera equipment, the 16 hour day, or maybe it's just that I concentrate so much of my energy into thinking, doing, acting, shooting. It's focused on the couple. It's focused on the group. It's focused on producing quality images. It's focused on telling a story. It is totally and completely outward.

And it's exhausting. In an awesome, beautiful, wow that was a great day, I love my job kind of way. But exhausting, nonetheless.

Because I'm an introvert.

See ... I am the girl who's much better one-on-one than being part of a large group. In that large group, I tend to gravitate toward the one person I know and stay there. I have a few really close friends, but not many acquaintances. I am the girl who isn't afraid of public speaking - if I know what I'm talking about. I am the girl who will speak her mind - if I feel strongly about it. I don't argue unless I know for sure that I'm right. I think things through two, three or four times before I do anything. And above all, my favorite part of being a wedding photographer is the relationship I develop with my brides+grooms.

Because I'm an introvert.

Which is also what happens to make me good at my job. That relationship that {we} develop, that one-on-one, that trust is what creates beautiful images.

All of my energy that entire day, is focused on {you}. You are important to me, your photos are important to me, your day is important to me. Because hopefully, throughout the entire wedding planning process, we've become friends.

When you hire a photographer, be an introvert and focus on how you feel when you're around them. Are you comfortable? Are you nervous? Excited? Anxious? Relaxed? Confident? Forget price, forget time, forget packages. How do you feel?

Because you're not just hiring a vendor, you're hiring a friend. A friend who will be there all day. A friend who will be part of your most intimate of moments. A friend who is responsible for the one thing that will last forever.

So today, {what makes me happy} is knowing that being an introvert is not a negative. That it's totally okay to need to "recharge." That is a good thing to stop and think. That being alone is a-okay.

Because it's what makes me happy. And that's what matters.

~di

*Shot with my little Canon point+shoot. Hiking with my hubby+dogs to "recharge" makes me even happier.

Just for fun: doggies!

Puppies are always down with being models when I get a new lens:

I've borrowed two lenses for Sunday's wedding, and am so excited to see them in action!

~di